Missing the Man we lost on Fathers Day.

Some people that come into our lives with a character that is so big their life follows you around long after they are gone. My father in law was one of those people; I shouldn’t say was, because he is still with me. Many of the memories of him are of him lumbering across the front yard at the cabin. The beautiful summer home set back from the waters of Duck Lake in northern Minnesota. I remember the first weekend my husband brought me to the cabin, the one bathroom, sleep where you can find a spot piece of heaven on earth. The place where family gathered, played games, roasted marshmallows and caught fish.  The lake where the kids learned to water ski and how to build a good campfire, the place where the adult beverages could be creative. The place where my father in law found the project of the week. Where he taught my step son to turn a boat house into a guest cabin. Where he taught our nieces and nephews how to fish and my sister in laws and I how put new shingles on the cabin.

When we went to the cabin, we took turns cooking meals, telling stories and sometimes had contests of who could go the longest without showering. We were delightfully isolated. Cell phones didn’t work, we would drive to the top of the hill if we desperately needed to make a call, and typically we didn’t. After a few years my in-laws built on a big addition, we celebrated a cold Christmas there. Friends and extended family visited.  
Memorial Day weekend welcomed the entire family. Our kids would not so patiently await the temp reaching 70 degrees that is when grandma gave them the go-ahead to jump in the freezing lake, sometimes the ice would have been off for a few short weeks. When you go knee deep in a project my father in law would listen intently, wait for other responses, then say, “I am not going to tell you what to do, but if it was me…” We laugh now of his passive aggressive way of giving advice. We learned to wait for it, anticipating his answer. Dave passed away 11 years ago on fathers day. We all miss him. We miss his infectious smile, his playful banter with the grand kids, but mostly we miss him NOT telling us what to do. Happy Fathers day Dave!