Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Preparing for a Fatherless Fathers Day

The title is a bit clumsy, there really is no prep work for Fathers Day when you are Fatherless, and you really aren’t Fatherless, everyone at one time had a Father. It is the title that keeps kicking back into my mind; therefore it is meant to be.

So what does that mean? It means you spend your weeks and days before Fathers day being reminded you don’t need to buy a Father’s Day card this year. The radio, TV and newspaper ads remind you time is running out to buy that perfect fishing rod or even tie. You are reminded as you walk down the aisle of almost any store that they have a shirt, gadget or tool Dad will love. You don't plan a picnic or family gathering. You don't call your siblings to see what they are doing for dad. You don't prepare. Ironic, because in the years my Father was alive, it always seemed it was a last minute deal, picking up a gift or sending a card, where were the reminders then?

This year, like the past few we will not be celebrating Fathers day like we once did. Four years ago on the morning of Father’s Day, my father-in- law Dave took his last breath. Three months before that we had lost my dad. Just like that we would no longer celebrate Fathers Day with our Dads.

So now all we have are the memories of these two guys that guided us through our formidable years, who steered us as we became parents and led us into mid-life. Recently, we were talking about how young our dads were when we lost them, they were in their 70’s, but we wanted 80’s. It wasn’t our choice, we had to do with what they gave us, and it was a lot.

Some of their advice was not heeded when given, but none the less so many times we remember what they taught us and use it today. Little bits of advice they gave us years ago will pop up and be used today. Mark jokes about his Dad telling him to turn the lights off, I can hear Dave barking, “Do you think I work for the power company?” He did. That is one of my favorites since now we both work for the “Power” company. Stories my Dad told me while milking cows will pop into my head at times, mostly I remember what a gentle kind man he was, he loved being a Farmer, even though he would often tell us he didn’t know about many things because he was quote “Just a dumb farmer”. Then he would give us that crooked smile, we all knew he was a very intelligent man who loved the land and spent his years taking care of it. They gave us sage advice, listened to our stories and hugged us when we shed tears. Now we honor their memory and what they meant to us, not just on Father’s day but most days as we are reminded of them in everyday life.

In preparing for this Father’s Day we will just gather our memories, wishing we could share the stories of our children and grandchildren with them and we thank the good Lord for giving us Dave and Marwell. If you still have your Dad on this earth, let him know you love him, give him an extra hug. If you are a Father know that whatever you are doing, your children are watching.Make good choices that will stay with your children a life time. Be a good example and give your children something special to remember, even when you are gone! Happy Father’s Day!

I Just Don't Know What to Do! Written December 8th 2020- Posted When the sun is shining and Hope is in the air.

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